Pastor Bill Dogterom challenges the common idea that “being nice” is simply a matter of politeness or Hallmark-card virtue. In his Bible study podcast What A Healthy Soul ACTUALLY Looks Like From the Bible, he reframes kindness as mercy and goodness as grace — two of the most powerful forces for transformation in the universe.  (Listen Notes)

Dogterom explains that kindness is not just about surface-level niceness; it’s about embodying the fruit of the Spirit, especially love, mercy, and grace, which are active, relational, and rooted in God’s character. Love, in his view, is the environment the soul was made to swim in, while kindness is the outflow of that love in action.

He also emphasizes that the Christian life is not about avoiding suffering or hardship, but about receiving good things without running off like a kid with a popsicle — meaning we are called to be present, engaged, and generous even in joy. This presence and engagement are part of being “the salt of the earth and light of the world,” which requires both inner spiritual formation and outward mission. (www.gpvoices.org)

In his broader teaching, Dogterom stresses that holistic spiritual formation — cultivating the inner life in partnership with the Holy Spirit — is essential for living out kindness authentically. This means moving beyond superficial niceness to a life shaped by God’s mercy, grace, and love, which naturally influence how we relate to others.

In short, for Dogterom, being a “nice person” is not about making people comfortable; it’s about reflecting God’s character in a way that transforms relationships and culture.

“…love self as stewardship… Love is first a disposition, not a feeling. So it’s an orientation towards the goodness of the other, towards wishing them well, wishing myself well…”

“If I am waiting to feel love before I love, I’ll be waiting a long time.”

“So love as a feeling follows love as a disposition that then gets decided and acted on. So I can act in love without feeling love for someone.”

“The hardest thing to do is let God love you for no good reason.”

“…it was joy that enabled Jesus to endure the cross…”

– Bill Dogterom